so fuck class today. had one at 9. had one at 10. my alarm went off at 7:45, ashleynn called me at 8 something...yeah. turned my alarm off, and turned my phone off. then monique wakes up in such a good mood, waking me up. today just isn't a good day. i've realized i'm a grade A fuck up. if it's not one thing with me, it's another. god, michelle doesn't even understand how stupid i feel. how like so low deep in a hole. i feel so depressed, stressed, frustrated, angry...all that shit man. it just sucks so bad. i really don't feel like i can talk to anyone about it 'cause it seems i have all these problems coming to me, and i feel like no one wants to hear it. i know i have those friends who are always there for me, but i don't want them to ever be like, "damn, she has problems out the ass." that would be the absolute worst. my emotions are just all fucked up right now. one minute i'm happy, the next i'm upset over something; something ignorant. i just want everything to be all good. i want all these stupid problems i have to go away. i know no one lives the perfect life, but damn. sometimes i want to be living a perfect life. but yeah, that's something that just won't happen. bleh. i'm so in the wrong right now.
i don't wanna lose this relationship, and i hope she just gives another chance.
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